Hi! I am 22. I live in Myanmar but my little brother lives in Netherlands. I am working. He's only 19. He's enrolled for the military while i was away. I don't know if we could cancel it. But I really don't want him to go. I can't handle if he got shipped off to war. I don't really care if that's selfish but he's the only family I have since our parents died. He's very spoiled and it's all my fault, I know. He go against everything I tell him 'cos he thinks it's fun to get me mad. He's always out of control and going berserk like a mad bull. He's not a bad kid, I've always cleaned up his mess, so he never really knew all the messes he caused. I don't think he can deal with the discipline of military. People in military are just too tough. I am so worried. Can anybody suggest anything? I don't know what to do. I feel like I wanna just tie him up at home >.< I am being selfish perhaps. I'm so used to "Boe, I'm hungry." People might think it's weird. I'm also worried, he's joining the army so I can go to college. About 6 months ago, he asked me why I want him to go to college (he doesn't). I said, "Cos I want one of us to be a scholar. Since I am busy with work and him, I want you to go." He knows I always wanted to go to college, so maybe he made the decision 'cos of me. I don't want that. I don't want him to go to military more because he might wanna go there just because he doesn't wanna go to college -.-'' Seriously, there should be a book like "Brotherhood 101"
Family - 4 Answers
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1 :
i would let him join. chances are that he has thoroughly thought it through and anything you say wont change his mind. and with the way you described him as "He's always out of control and going berserk like a mad bull." sounds like it might give him an attitude change for the better.
2 :
Even though it may be hard seeing him go to the army, it might help him grow up and take responsibility. My step brother joined the army when I was in 7th grade, and 3 years later, when he came back, he became a lot more mature. I'm not quite sure, but I don't think there is any way to cancel after enrolling in the army.
3 :
There is a saying "if you love someone then set them free" You say he is only 19. I say he is already 19 and this means he is an adult taking steps out into the big bad world. I do empathise and especially as he is your only family, but at the same time, if this is something he wants to do then there is little you can do to stop him, and especially if he is bull headed! As mentioned before then actually this level of discipline would do him the world of good and help shape him into a well rounded adult. He won't be the first undisciplined young man to join and doubtless won't be the last The thing is you cannot shield him in cotton wool. he could walk out tomorrow and get knocked over by a bus. Indeed the Dutch military have withdrawn from Afganistan and withdrew from Iraq already in 2005. You have to take a deep breath, love him, support him and set him free to make his own choices, and then love him when he comes back which he inevitably will do if you give him the space :)
4 :
that's nice that you love him so much and everything but if he really wants to join then let him. that's what he wants, right? let him make himself out of something. and btw; thank you so much for answering my question. it was the best answer and i will totally tell him what you said to tell him!
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